Dear gods of plague and pestilence,
Clearly, your goal was to make sure that 3/4 of the humans in the house were on some sort of antibiotic. Quorum has been achieved. Your will is mighty. I scrape in your general direction.
Fortunately, we caught the Diva's ear infection before she became truly sick and unbearable. We are becoming wiser monkeys, thanks to you, oh plague and pestilence.
I would, however, like to do something other than whimper feebly while collapsed on the couch. It'd be nice to stay awake long enough to read the paper. I do appreciate the time you've given me to type this. I do. Thank you.
Message received, oh wise and benevolent gods. I shall scale back. Could you now turn your mighty wrath elsewhere? Say, to the Mooch? Seriously, oh gods. He could stand a smiting.
I humbly admit defeat,
PS -- one benefit of your ministration is that I got to read this article about a quantum computer that solved a problem before it was even asked. Given that my feeble brain -- even on its best days -- can only just barely come to grips with light being both a wave and a particle, this whole thing has left me gobsmacked.